Primage Pillars - #8: Make A Change
You know you want to
As you probably noticed, I’m laying out the 10 Primage Pillars - The manifesto for the project and our developing community.
Here’s where to go for the archive, if you missed the launch and Pillars #1 to #7.
Let’s get into Pillar #8 - Make A Change
They say a change is as good as a rest.
I have a better idea. Forget about resting - you’re already doing enough of that. Eight hours solid sleep a night, right? No? Try this.
Making a big, audacious life change shouldn’t feeling relaxing at all.
Having completely reset, refined and repurposed my precious existence on more than one occasion, I can tell you exactly how it made me feel:
Invigorated
Inspired
Born again (not like that)
Motivated
Happy, blooming happy
They’re definitely all positive emotions, so let’s have a look what kind of changes we’re talking about here, and how you can grab them with both hands and an open heart.
RELATIONSHIPS
It can feel tough breaking away from people who know longer serve you, or it could be awfully simple.
Long-term, intimate domestic relationships are one thing. Less intense, social or business connections are another.
But, irrespective of how tangled, involved and emotionally invested you are with another person, here are a few tough questions to ask yourself next time you’re looking in the mirror:
1: Can I be unapologetically myself? Do you feel safe expressing your thoughts without fear of judgment, or do you alter your behavior to keep the peace?
2: Does this relationship help me grow? Do you and your partner/friend make a good team, or do you feel like you have to give up your own dreams to stay in it?
3: Do I feel truly seen and heard? Do you feel valued, respected, and chosen? Do your feelings actually matter here?
4: Are we contributing equally? Uneven relationships are fundamentally unfair and soul-crushing. It’s not about keeping score, but you’ll instinctively know if you’re the one doing all the heavy lifting.
5: Are we traveling in the same direction? Do your core values, lifestyle, and life goals align for the long term?
I have some form in all this, having married four times and been involved in multiple business partnerships.
One thing I can say for sure - there’s no feeling sweeter and more liberating than ditching an unfulfilling relationship.
If any of that hits a nerve, maybe it’s time to have the conversation.
LOCATION
Again, something I can talk about from experience - moving where on the globe you lay your head has a profound effect on your wellbeing, your motivation and your physical health.
In my life so far, I’ve lived in 17 different houses/apartments in three different countries.
Not exactly the archetypal Digital Nomad, but enough to feel the benefits of mobility and reinvention.
Moving location allows you to broaden your horizons, build fresh social connections, and completely tailor your lifestyle to your needs.
Some benefits I’ve discovered include:
Business & Financial Growth: I’ve unlocked new opportunities and lower living costs to build wealth. I’m more motivated than ever by the mission of growing CIB to a global wellbeing force.
Mental & Physical Well-being: Moving to the sunshine of the Mediterranean has reduced stress, anxiety and burnout, and healthcare in Gib is superb.
Social & Cultural Enrichment: I love to meet new people, expand my network, and immerse myself in new customs.
Fresh Start & Decluttering: I’ve shed old habits and literally/mentally decluttered my life. I estimate we got rid of 50% of our accumulated possessions by volume before we moved here.
Planning and executing a house move - particularly overseas - is a huge logistical challenge. Although stressful at the time, I realise it made me more resilient and resourceful. If I could pull that off, I could do anything I wanted to do in my next chapter.
CAREER
You’ll remember that Primage is THE Anti-Retirement Project, so don’t be surprised if I keep nudging you about what you’re doing day-to-day, and how that shouldn’t include the phrase “nothing much”.
Your career is called “what you do for a living”, and that’s because living fully and deeply requires a purpose. A passion, a direction, a reason to rise in the morning.
But that doesn’t mean you have to hustle and grind, and it certainly doesn’t mean you have to stick with what you’ve always done, or even what you’re doing right now.
The most rewarding changes I’ve made in my life involve reinventing my business personna. Doing something different, grasping a fresh start in a fresh market with fresh challenges, people and ideas.
We’ll be talking a lot more about how to identify and enact the perfect next career as we evolve the Primage Project, but Pillar #8 is just here to remind you that nobody is making you do anything you don’t truly feel excited about.
If you don’t geek out over your work, if you don’t feel stretched and challenged, if you don’t believe you’re creating an impact and it doesn’t align with your values and goals, then it’s time to change.
Doing the wrong job is no way to live, and it’s on you. There’s a world of choice ahead of you, and infinite reward awaits.
Key takeaways from today:
You should question everything about your lived experience:
1: Am I in the right place on earth? It’s easier than you think to watch the sunrise from a different angle, and the benefits are enormous and immediate.
2: Am I doing what I love, or just doing something? If you hate your career, that’s you did that to yourself. Stop it and choose something else from the rich menu of possibilities.
3: Do I have the right people around me? Relationships with other humans are arguably the most important element of your lived experience. Don’t compromise.
You are in your Primage. It’d be a crime to waste it.
Jonny
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